40 Days Plus: Day 2

“How sweet, the presence of Jesus to the longing, harassed soul! It is instant peace, and balm to every wound.” ~ Elizabeth Ann Seton

Two Days to Wait, Ponder, Deliberate, Monday – 4th of March 2019 nearing 3:00 a.m.

During the night – a fiery reign of words befriends me, leaving me with a bewildered mind, and a tasteless heart. Upon awakening, my heart realized its ugliness. I cannot say “never again” for it will occur without warning, again, in the future, or in the Now. I am a useless instrument without the Word. It is here I receive nourishment for my soul. I open the Book.

During my life I witness a time to cry. A time to repent will follow. The streams of sorrow flow from my heart. I am remorseful, unhappy, and sad. I thought I was a treasured possession of God’s love. Why so sad? What touches a man’s heart so – upon being wrong, but, the grace of God? Delving deeper into the mysteries of the heart share an all-powerful love. I have come to realize, I am a treasure. I am. Not externally but by the very flesh of my heart. Is this not his resting place? Where he desires to dwell?

Thank you O Heavenly One, for the one who dwells within this mighty place. I am not left without promise but saved by grace. Because, he first loved me to render me his Love through dying upon a tree. But, upon rising he set me free. Now, I know I am his, and his possession, alone. And, before this journey upon this hour, I dedicate all that I am.

Forgive me, O Lord, for what I have been and guide me for what I shall be. I am sorry.

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